From: Arena, Steve [Steve.Arena@pacificpower.com.au]
Sent: Friday, August 31, 2001 12:05 AM
To: Info-VAX@Mvb.Saic.Com
Subject: RE: Fun error messages (was Re: VMS high reliability needed by
Air Force)

Alan


I thought you may enjoy the following ( original author unknown). Those VMS
people now forced over to Microsoft O/S's may appreciate these.
===============================================
Haiku Error Messages
In Japan, they have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful
Microsoft Error
messages with
Haiku poetry messages.

Haiku poetry has strict construction rules. Each poem has
only three lines,
17 syllables: five
syllables in the first line, seven in the second, five in
the third.

Haikus are used to communicate a timeless message often
achieving a wistful,
yearning and
powerful insight through extreme brevity - the essence of
Zen:

Your file was so big.
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.

The Web site you seek
Cannot be located,
but Countless more exist.

Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.

Program aborting:
Close all that you have worked on.
You ask far too much.

Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.

Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.

First snow, then silence.
This thousand-dollar screen dies
So beautifully.

The Tao that is seen
Is not the true Tao-until
You bring fresh toner.

A crash reduces
Your expensive computer
To a simple stone.

Three things are certain:
Death, taxes and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.

You step in the stream,
But the water has moved on.
 This page is not here.

Out of memory.
We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.

Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared. Screen.
Mind. Both are blank.

=====================================================

I know that this forum does contain the occasional technical issue but it is
primarily devoted to VMS nostalgia and other trivia such as this message.

Do you know of a newgroup devoted to primarily to current VMS technical
issues?

Regards
Steve

> -----Original Message-----
> From:	afeldman@gfigroup.com [SMTP:afeldman@gfigroup.com]
> Sent:	Thursday, 30 August 2001 23:30
> To:	Info-VAX@Mvb.Saic.Com
> Subject:	Fun error messages (was Re: VMS high reliability needed by
> Air Force)
> 
> Alan Greig <a.greig@virgin.net> wrote in message
> news:<dv2cotk1jcmjd1n5n61q0lcinkf5n57pjd@4ax.com>...
> > On 24 Aug 2001 01:08:50 GMT, Joe Heimann <heimann@nog.ecs.umass.edu>
> > wrote:
> [snip]> 
> > I recall a VAX with an add in processor card running some library
> > software. The second processor/OS crashed with the error "Full power
> > to the shields Mr. Sulu"
> 
> One of my all-time favorties is the first one in the book:
> 
>  AAA,  'file-spec'
>  
>   Facility:     RUNOFF, DIGITAL Standard Runoff (DSR)
>  
>   Explanation:  This message should never be displayed.
>  
>   User Action:  Submit a Software Performance Report (SPR).
>  
> 
> Oh no!!! I just displayed this message! :-)
> 
> Disclaimer: JMHO
> Alan E. Feldman
> afeldman@gfigroup.com